Welcome back to a new blog post and this one is close to my heart. Growing up a teenage girl I understand the daily challenges and struggles you face because believe me when I say, at one point or another, we have all been there in some way. Trust me! The pressure you feel as a teenager to “fit in” or be “popular” almost every child goes through and though I have not lived a huge part of my life yet, I wish I would have had someone to tell me things about my teenage years! Maybe then I would have worried far less! Hopefully I can pass on some advice to all of you reading and you can all learn from my experiences.
Growing up I was definitely never part of the “popular” group. I never seemed to fit in and always appeared the odd person of a group. At the time I thought that was a huge deal, but reflecting on it all now, I encourage you all to stand out from the crowd and be who you are, unique and special in your own way. Yes everyone always tell you to be who you are but at school that seems like the hardest thing. With peer pressure and the desire to fit in and be popular it seems almost impossible, but believe me when I say there is nothing more important you can do for yourself other than being your very own person.
Unfortunately, it’s not just that easy. Everyone can tell you a million times but it takes time to develop the courage and strength to be different and not follow the crowd. As you grow up though, you learn more and more its not about “fitting in” and being “popular”, but it’s about being who you are and having people respect you for who you are. When you are younger its seems like the end of the world (lets be honest us teens are dramatic) that you don’t fit into that category and don’t have a tonne of friends. For us, at that moment in our lives, they are the most important things and what we don’t realise is that in reality all that really matters is that we have a few close friends we can depend on and who loves us for being no one other than ourselves. The people you want to surround yourself with are those who strive to better us as a person and encourage us to develop and grow but more more importantly those who accept us, flaws and all.
It is certainly easy for me to tell you this but I know from experience it is a lot harder than what everyone makes out. I just urge you all to have enough self belief and confidence to stand up for yourself and to not change for any one. Just remember the right people will love you for who you are and that is all that counts. Although having lots of friends appears to make you happy, you will find in actual fact having two or three friends who truly accept you is more than enough. Those friendships are what you need to develop and treasure. I really wish I would have had the courage to stand up for myself sooner and stopped trying to please everyone. It is true also, no matter what you do for people, for some people you will never be enough and they will never see your worth and potential.
Just be yourself. Let people see the real, imperfect, flawed, quirky, beautiful and magical person that you are.
Trying to be someone else is a waste of being you. You were born to stand out, not fit in with the crowd.
Always remember an original is worth more than a copy.
Another thing I definitely started to struggle with as a teenager was confidence. I lacked confidence in general and was always the timid girl who would shy away from speaking and performing or putting myself forward for things, but I also seriously lacked so much body confidence. From these points, I guess there are two main points I want to make.
- Its okay to be shy and lack confidence, however, try and push yourself and put yourself forward for things because you will thank yourself for it. At the time you may hate it and feel uncomfortable but gradually, time by time things become easier and you find out that you enjoy yourself a lot more and are a lot happier because you can join in and participate. Its one thing I wish I would have known sooner. I think if I would have realised this I would have took so many great opportunities and had some really rewarding and life changing experiences. For me now, I keep pushing myself to put myself forward and I can honestly say I should have done it sooner! I just love how many opportunities and experiences it creates.
- Body confidence as a teenager is a major issue – female or male.I can imagine some males experience the same feeling as us females only for different reasons. Deep down, no matter how confident we are, none of us are perfect and we will all feel insecure about something and there will always be a feature that we want to change. I know how it feels for the majority of girls. I battled this for many years.The photos and pictures you see in the media or in magazines creates that image of what the “perfect” body type is – figure and shape. We allow ourselves to be consumed by those pictures and we want to change to fit that model and be deemed beautiful. Quite often we are too busy trying to change ourselves to feel beautiful we forget to respect ourselves and love who we are. We ignore the beauty we are and focus on the imperfections instead of realising we are all beautiful in own way no matter what figure we are or what hair we have. So to all the girls out there, just know you are beautiful no matter what you think and a number on the scales doesn’t define who you are. You are beautiful inside and out!
To all the girls that think you’re fat because you’re not size zero. You’re the beautiful one its society that’s ugly.
Sorry this is a very long post and I am sure I have rambled and gone off on a tangent at some point! Even so, this is will have been well worth the time even it if helps just one of you who reads this. I hope it has encouraged and inspired you to stay true to who you are and gave you a bit of advice to help you in some areas in your teenage years. I will be back with similar posts as well as much more.
See you in the next one X